Fear of paying for someone elses groceries

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Once I was shopping and the cashier got angry at me because I put down that little bar that separates the groceries from one customer to the next. She said “Real cashiers don’t need that bar”

Sometimes you do need that bar. I wasn’t paying attention and someone else’s laundry detergent was being charged to my account. Instead of wasting time by walking all the way to customer service and back (Walmart). I simply said “enjoy your laundry on me”. Well, maybe that didn’t sound right.

Guardians of the Galaxy Review

I don’t see many movies at the theater mainly because it costs so much and I can buy the VHS LaserDisc DVD Blu-ray a few months later and watch it as much as I want for the same price. I didn’t know much about Guardians of the Galaxy before this movie since I never read Marvel comics growing up as a kid. I was too busy hitting a baseball in the gaps and throwing people out at second base to care about comic books. GotG reminded me of when I first saw Star Wars in the fact that it was like exploring a whole new universe.

Star Lord

I never thought I’d see the day when Andy Dwyer would be a movie star, but he seems to be doing quite well for himself. Not a fan of his 80′s Walkman and the terrible music that spilled forth from it. “Ain’t no mountain high enough” should not be allowed in anymore movies. Not because it’s a bad song, it because its used way too often.

Gamora

I’m still not sure what her point was in the movie. I don’t remember her motivation or what she was trying to accomplish. Maybe I missed it because they didn’t make her interesting enough.

Groot

They probably could have saved a bunch of money by not hiring Vin Diesel to say the same line over and over. He reminded me a lot of Chewbacca especially in parts where he would say “I am Groot” and Rocket would understand what he was meaning based on the inflection.

Rocket

Probably my least favorite character, probably because I do not like Bradley Cooper. Interesting to see a talking raccoon though.

Drax

Reminded me of an person trying trying to read the Bible an takes everything in a wooden literal sense.

Thanos

After seeing Thanos at the end of the Avengers everyone was intimidated and there was a sense of mystery. In GotG he’s just sitting in a chair being lazy letting people play with his gems without doing anything about it. He reminded me of Darth Sidious, not doing much until he needs too.

Overall a good movie, I probably should have waited to see it when it came out on VHS LaserDisc DVD Blu-ray. That way I can pause the movie when my kids have to get up 4 or 5 times to use the bathroom like the people of in front me at the theater.

Kids Just Love Red Dye 40!

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Since we found out our children have adverse reactions to Red Dye 40, it’s all they want. When our kids become teenagers we won’t have to worry about drugs and alcohol. No, the forbidden fruit will be the sweet nectar of Hawaiian Punch with its intoxicating combination of High Fructose Corn Syrup and Red Dye 40. Teens will be grabbing a Forty of Red Dye 40 and dipping their special edition “Red Forties” Popsicle in it. It’s all about the marketing…

Video Games and your Children

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Video Games are great babysitters, kids want to play them and you don’t want to deal with your kids. Perfect solution? Video games do have benefits such as developing hand eye coordination and unleashing fits of rage when the Kindle Freetime runs out.

Minecraft

What’s the deal with Minecraft? The first question that someone will ask me is: “Have you ever played it”.  I don’t have to, and here’s why…

As a kid growing up in the 80′s playing 8bit Nintendo, I find it rather insulting that all the video game progress is thrown down the rubbish shoot. Kids these days are now playing games that look worse than the Atari 2600. By the way the phrase “Kids these days” unlocks 300+ old person attributes.

Technology Progression

This is the way it’s supposed to work. Every few years a new system would come out that would improve on video game graphics. Sega Genesis was a huge leap from the Master System and Nintendo. When the PlayStation hit the market I thought this has to be it, nothing can get better. Well now we have the PlayStation 4 and it blurs the line between reality and fiction (well, not really). I bet kids today would lose their minds if Nam co re-released RBI Baseball and called it new. (Side note: RBI Baseball for Nintendo was awesome, and I’d probably still be playing it if I had a NES)

Come to think about it, parents getting their kids hooked on Minecraft frees up more time for them on the PlayStation or Xbox. Maybe that’s a good thing.

Buffalo Wild Wings Ghost Pepper Sauce Review

Buffalo Wild Wings Ghost Pepper

Buffalo Wild Wings Ghost Pepper Wings

I was browsing the menu when I saw this in the “Sauce Lab” section. I wish I hadn’t ordered it. Not because it was hot, but because it tasted horrible. I was expecting something more detrimental to my GI tract than their Blazin’ Sauce. Instead I got this weak sauce that tasted like acid reflux. Maybe the heat was so overpowering that it triggered acid reflux, who knows. Good thing I ordered the Thai Curry to get the taste out of my face cavity. I’d say yank this from the line up. It needs to be hotter than the blazin’ sauce.

Homeschool kids are weird anti-social misfits…

One of the first questions I’m asked about homeschooling is “Do you worry about your kids getting the social interaction they need?” I simply say “No, I’m not worried”. That answer is usually not good enough for home school skeptic. If you think about it home school kids are way more socialized than public school or private school kids. Consider a typical school day that I experienced back in the 80′s. I can only imagine it is more strict today.

  • Forced to wake up at the crack of dawn, which made me grumpy and resentful (yes even more so).
  • Eat breakfast by a certain time so we wouldn’t miss the bus
  • Ride the bus where kids were usually fighting or learning new curse words
  • Get to school where you had to sit down immediately and be quiet
  • Start your lesson (more of the no talking policy enforced)
  • No passing notes or talking
  • Raise your hand to ask a question or get called on when the teacher knew you didn’t have the answer which led to merciless mocking by classmates before the teacher told everyone to quiet down.
  • Panic attacks from a loud bell going off signaling the next class or lunch break
  • Not going to the bathroom when you want causing tremendous gas back up from the big bowl of cracklin oat bran you had in the morning.
  • Going to the bathroom and waiting in line with a group.
  • Walking single file to the next class or lunch room with no talking
  • Not having recess because we talked too much during class
  • Having to hurry to the next class because the bell schedule between classes was so short giving us less opportunity to socialize.
  • If you did socialize you were marked tardy to class(enough of these would cause detention).
  • Detention: If you were late or talked too much in class, you went to a separate room to not talk or do anything else.
  • Arrive home to do the mountains of homework.
  • Hopefully by then you’ll have enough time to go play with your friends before it gets dark.
  • Go to bed and start the cycle all over again.

Typical Home School Day

  • Wake up Naturally
  • Help cook breakfast.
  • Do schoolwork that interests you.
  • Go to the bathroom whenever you want.
  • Ask as many questions as you like without fear of condemnation
  • Pass all the notes you want.
  • If you get frustrated with your work, go outside and play, listen to music, or play a game.
  • Stay on a subject as long as you want and not being held back if you master a subject quickly.
  • Help cook lunch.
  • Meet up with other home school friends and play at the empty Chick-Fil-A playground.
  • Interacting with other home school kids of different ages increasing social skills.
  • Since all your work is done at home you have no “homework”.
  • Field Trips without crowds
  • Have more time to play team sports, and practice during the day as part of “P.E.”

Feel free to use this as your default response.

My Life is Way Better than Yours

It doesn’t take long for someone to come out of the woodwork to grandstand. It doesn’t matter what the topic, subject or item. They have something better and will be quick to criticize.  It could be something you have or don’t have. It could also be a comparison of why theirs is better.

Children

Whatever your child has done, their child has done it earlier, with more precision or was funnier than yours.

Technology

If someone has a superior item they will be quick to point out the shortcomings of yours. If they don’t have a superior item they will say you overpaid or wasted your money on features you will never use.

Vehicles

Showing off your new vehicle will induce questions about why you didn’t purchase the competitors model which has far better features that will prevent your loved ones from dying a tragic death in an automobile accident.

Project

You’ve spent hours working on that special project that you’re ready to show off to the world. You have that friend that will point out the flaws and say things like. “Oh, I see you took a few shortcuts and the easy way, here look at my project this is how you should have done it.”

Of course there’s always the “Must Be Nice” person who throws a veiled insult of why you shouldn’t have anything they don’t have.

How to deal with this?

Stop trying to show off and brag. Let other people notice your work, don’t show it off and expect admiration and affirmation. If someone offers up unwanted criticism or advice explain to them that you appreciate their spirit in wanting to help and let them know the next time you start a project or need some advice. Try to do that with as little sarcasm as possible.

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